Does any body else besides myself find it hard to date and meet singles because they have Diabeties. I am single and am finding difficult to meet somebody who understands diabeties . some people are thinking it a death sentence that is something wrong with you. i am starting to think I should not tell anyone. i am actually healthier than most people.
If anybody knows any single girls that would help to lol...
Mark
i donno about you, but i don't announce i have diabetes until it comes up in conversation, things start to get serious, or something happens while i'm with them like a low bloodsugar. most of the people i've dated since high school know little to nothing about diabetes, but i haven't had any problems.
it definitely shouldn't be something you open with "hey my names mark. i'm __years old and have diabetes.", it's something that you deal with but isn't something that defines who you are.
i find people of the opposite sex who obsess over a medical condition, etc, VERY unattractive...even if it's just asthma.
a lot of times, when people get to know you and see how diabetes doesn't bother you or affect who you are as a person, it won't bother them either. i can't say i've dated too many people, but for those i have, diabetes wasn't a big deal to them. they knew the basics and what to do if something went wrong, but they cared about me as a person - diabetes was just one of my many (amazing) traits :o)
i don't typically bring diabetes up either. by no means do i go around hiding it, but my personal health isn't something i chat about when i'm looking for a date. it usually eventually comes up, and i'm always open and honest about it. if someone doesn't like you because of diabetes, they probably aren't worth knowing anyway.
if you feel comfortable enough, you can use it as a teaching opportunity. sometimes a person's fear of a disease is simply based on a lack of knowledge and understanding. you can provide them with the education, and they might just change their mind about the disease and about you. essentially, it's all about how YOU handle it. if you present yourself in a manner where you're embarrassed of diabetes, don't ever want to talk about it, or hide it, someone might get the impression the disease is something really terrible. let me tell you, confidence in a man truly means everything.
I don't hide it...if we go out to dinner and I bolus...the jig is kind of up ya know?
Some girls have been intrigued with it. Others are curious. As much as I hate to say this, my ex was the best girlfriend I ever had as far as diabetes goes. She went out of her way to learn about it...symptoms of high/low glucose, side effects and things that can happen to your body...she did everything she could to learn about it so that if something happened to me she'd be able to help, or if I was acting a certain way, she'd know what the root of the problem was.
I think they key is finding someone who understands. It's sad that there are people out there who would rather avoid you and pass up an opportunity to be happy because of an auto-immune disease. Thankfully, I haven't run into that situation yet, but time will tell!
The big D wasn't ever something I brought up right away, either... I was on MDI the last time I "dated" (I started the pump after I met my husband), so I would just sneak off to the bathroom to take a shot when we ate, or whatever.
I think your attitude about it makes all the difference. To me, it's not a big deal; it's just part of my life. I think the way you look at it determines how the other person looks at it. I actually asked my husband last night why he doesn't seem to bring up stuff to me. I told him how people on here (he's well aware that I'm addicted to this website) talk about their significant others asking when the last time they tested was, or how they're doing BS-wise, etc... and he never does that. It never stuck me as odd until I saw that other people have it a different way. His response? "Well, you're always so on top of it... I figure you've got it handled, and if you need my help you'll ask." I took that as a pretty nice compliment!
Sorry if this was ramble-y, I just checked my CGM and I'm 71 and dropping. TIME FOR ICE CANDY!
[quote user="Kim"]
The big D wasn't ever something I brought up right away, either... I was on MDI the last time I "dated" (I started the pump after I met my husband), so I would just sneak off to the bathroom to take a shot when we ate, or whatever.
I think your attitude about it makes all the difference. To me, it's not a big deal; it's just part of my life. I think the way you look at it determines how the other person looks at it. I actually asked my husband last night why he doesn't seem to bring up stuff to me. I told him how people on here (he's well aware that I'm addicted to this website) talk about their significant others asking when the last time they tested was, or how they're doing BS-wise, etc... and he never does that. It never stuck me as odd until I saw that other people have it a different way. His response? "Well, you're always so on top of it... I figure you've got it handled, and if you need my help you'll ask." I took that as a pretty nice compliment!
Sorry if this was ramble-y, I just checked my CGM and I'm 71 and dropping. TIME FOR ICE CANDY!
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i have to agree. your attitude plays a big part. if you're not comfortable with it, obviously the other person isn't going to be. especially if you have little to no past experience being around someone with Type1 or even Type2.
Solution to the problem would be to find another Type 1 and date them haha. That way you both have the same disease!
Marketing idea maybe? Like "J-date" but for Type 1's .
Ideas:
- Type1Tango
- PancreasPals
- Humalog Honeys
- Animas Anonymous
- Beta Cell Beauties
- DiaDate
Why yes I am a little bored :)
[quote user="Pat"]
Solution to the problem would be to find another Type 1 and date them haha. That way you both have the same disease!
Marketing idea maybe? Like "J-date" but for Type 1's .
Ideas:
- Type1Tango
- PancreasPals
- Humalog Honeys
- Animas Anonymous
- Beta Cell Beauties
- DiaDate
Why yes I am a little bored :)
[/quote]
cute idea. might work for some..but for me? nooooo way. i would bet $100 I would be in a huge fight with that person within a week of dating. I get into squabbles with my boyfriends as it is over my diabetes(my current boyfriend likes to comment on how much sugar i eat)...add a person who has diabetes to that equation and I'll probably rip their head off.
I was thinking a more constructive role. If you're both T1, you both have an understanding of what the other is going through. Some people manage their stuff differently but it would be nice to have someone around (especially if their numbers are better than mine) to keep me in check.
Though I can picture you ripping someone's head off...crazy natalie :P
[quote user="Pat"]
I was thinking a more constructive role. If you're both T1, you both have an understanding of what the other is going through. Some people manage their stuff differently but it would be nice to have someone around (especially if their numbers are better than mine) to keep me in check.
Though I can picture you ripping someone's head off...crazy natalie :P
[/quote]
what can i say? i'm stubborn :P
[quote user="Pat"]
Solution to the problem would be to find another Type 1 and date them haha. That way you both have the same disease!
Marketing idea maybe? Like "J-date" but for Type 1's .
Ideas:
- Type1Tango
- PancreasPals
- Humalog Honeys
- Animas Anonymous
- Beta Cell Beauties
- DiaDate
Why yes I am a little bored :)
[/quote]
Too funny!!!! I am dealing with this dating issue right now, and it's nice to see all your responses. This is the first time I've dated someone since I went on the pump so it's an added level of confusion for me. On the plus side, I don't have to dart to the bathroom at dinner, but it also looks like I am checking my blackberry or something when I bolus before I eat. Guess we'll see how it goes!
diabeti-date would be my choice.
i think dating another diabetic would be both beneficial for me and incredibly annoying. don't know if i could do it. someone find me a dateable diabetic to test theories.
Haha, you guys are funny :)
I find it hard to just find a date in general...after you get out of school theres sort of a lack of opportunities to connect with new people. But for sure don't list D as one of your "qualities". Wait til they get to know you and see if they like you first. People are more accepting of things when they actually know someone. It can be a turnoff when they don't know you/ could care less about you. Sad but true :)
On another note...maybe start a "singles" group here on juvenation!
suzanne
There are so many singles on here I think.
I haven't had any bad experiences with my dating history and diabetes. Sorta hard to hide it when I wear my pump on my hip. It's more fun when you walk around and people know what it is and ask you questions about it etc. Curiosity is better than fear, but I've yet to meet someone who is like "OMG a diabetic, get in the car!"
[quote user="Pat"]Solution to the problem would be to find another Type 1 and date them haha. That way you both have the same disease! [/quote]
Good idea ;o)
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[quote user="Pat"]
[quote user="Trisha"]
[quote user="Pat"]Solution to the problem would be to find another Type 1 and date them haha. That way you both have the same disease! [/quote]
Good idea ;o)
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Don't you think? :-)
[/quote]
*gag*
haha =P
hahahaha batts
[quote user="Batts"]
*gag*
haha =P
[/quote]LOL! Does Pat make you gag Batts? Not me, he's cute :o) I'd be his girlfriend :oD
hahahahahaha!
Trishaaaa and Paaaat, sittin' in a tree....