Poem About Diabetes

General
1

So, I was working on an English assignment the other day and one of the ten poems I had to write was a ballad. Now, I almost never write poetry, but I love reading it. Seeing as ballads are sometimes depressing or sad, I was trying to think of something uplifting to write about. Well, that didn't work, so I thought I'd take a stab at trying to write about diabetes.

Forgive me if this sounds too depressing. I realized half way through that it was turning out to be kind of a downer, so I tried to make it end on a happy note. I really wasn't trying to sound depressing. I just needed a good subject to write about. (=

I thought it turned out fairly well. It's obviously not the best poem in the world, but I thought I'd share it anyway. Here goes.

 

Remember

In the quiet of the night

She cries silent tears

For she can no longer remember

Living without her fears

 

It was just eight years ago

When she was just a child

But she can no longer remember

Her life when it was not wild

 

She silently thanks her God

For allowing her to stay

On this lovely earth

For even another day

 

She smiles at her bittersweet memories

And slowly wipes her tears

For although before is forgotten

She trusts God will ease her fears

 

What do you think? Is it an okay poem for someone who doesn't write poetry? Or is it really bad? Don't be afraid to tell the truth. (=

 

|†~*Sarah*~†|

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2

Hi Sarah,

I like your poem becausein it you offer a positive, spiritual message within a well-depicted nighttime solitude.  Here you have a child who is beginning to think like an adult, ... who at first, intuitively and automatically, expresses a negative and depressing view of the factual reality of her diabetes.  She laments because she can't even remember what it was like not to have diabetes and not to have the "fears" she has today.

Then, as you said in your message presenting your poem, she consciously takes control of her thoughts as if to say "Wait a minute... there's another deeper, universal way to view this."  She begins to pray, and in her prayer there is comfort and solace.  That is where the real "quiet" and "silence" resides.  There is no real quiet and silence in "fear"... real quiet and silence is in "faith." 

"God," she prays "I believe in you because you saved me by alowing me to live another day... all the rest of my days." 

"So God," she believes "Just as you have done this, you will also suppress my fears."

Here, however, is the beautiful irony of your poem:  Since she (or you) can not really remember her life before diabetes and the fears that come with diabetes, hasn't God ALREADY begun to suppress her fears and heal her pain?  It was indeed God's will too that she (or you) forgot the pre-diabetes life.  It's the same as forgetting what the "icing on the cake" or the "chocolate bar" ever tasted like.  You won't miss it as much if you can't remember it.  What you can't remember, you won't yearn for.

 

3

Sarah,

I really love your poem. I think that many people reading it that have diabetes will be able to relate to it and put themselves in your words. I felt like you were writing about me! Great job!

4

Paul-

Yes, I agree with you about the fact that God has already begun to suppress my fears. (Yes, it is about me, just in third person.) I believe that there is a reason that I have this disease, but I don't believe that God was the one who gave it to me. I know that He knew it would happen and He allowed it to happen, but I don't believe that He was the one who made it happen. It was definitely His will to allow me to forget my life before diabetes, so that I won't have anything to compare it to. I also believe that He has the ability to heal me, in whatever way. Thank you for your feedback; I really appreciate it.

 

Gina-

Thanks, I'm glad you like it and can relate. (=

 

|†~*Sarah*~†|

5

Hi Sarah,

With those kinds of questions you're beginning to touch on the larger question of "Why bad things happen to good people."  I agree with you not to blame God, or may I add your parents, anyone else, or yourself for "our" diabetes.  With the "the bad" there always comes "the good," like the compassionate and brave actions of the NYC police officers and firefighters after nine-eleven.  Of course in a far lesser way, what we are attempting to do through JDRF and Juvenation represents the same principle.  In order for mankind to triumph, he (she) must have something to triumph over.

So, I'm curious, what are you planning to do for a career?  Are you going to college this year or the next year.  You're so intelligent and so talented, it will probably be very difficult to make a choice.

P

6

Paul-

I agree with you about the fact that we must have something to celebrate over in order to do so. Something good always comes from something bad, even if we don't realize it at first.

Thank you for the compliment, and I have definitely thought about what I would like to do for a living. I will be a junior in high school this coming fall, so I still have a couple of years before college. I am planning to major in communications, with a focus on print journalism. I am currently an editor for my school newspaper, and I write for the local paper, as well. I love writing, and will hopefully pursue journalism as a career.

 

|†~*Sarah*~†|

7

Well done Sarah