I wish I had my own diabetic friend to take care of!

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1

My friends are often saying "you need to eat now" or "maybe you should test".   I recently

started to think of it from their perspective and I think they LIKE helping.

It makes them feel

special or something.  Sometimes I think they try to be "the best" at it and want to be the one

I call when I need something. 

I used to think I was annoying if I asked for help, but I really think they get a kick out of it

now.  I'm a little pissed by it, but hey, if it makes them happy.  Truthfully, I wish I had a friend who had a problem that I knew how to help.  Maybe I should be a nurse:-)

Agree or disagree?

2

Hi,

You can help other Diabetics!! :)

You Should be a nurse. And I can be your friend that you can help me and I can help you.

I have been a Diabetic T1 for 33 years 

 

Spuddy

3

I think that my friends think that I am so used to having diabetes, that it doesn't hurt me anymore.  Whenever I say ouch when I prick my finger or if my pump site hurts, they are like " I thought you would be used to it by now. "

Also it annoys me when I'm checking my sugar and people say, "Ew." I mean seriously, can you just say it in your head? It actually makes me feel bad that keeping myself alive is gross.

Lastly, it's annoying when my friends talk about how scared they are of needles, and I'm scared of needles too. I'll say, "Yeah I hate needles." and my friends will be like, "Shut up your used to them by now stop talking." - or something like that. I just think people need to have more of an understanding of what we feel.

Sometimes, if I'm having a really bad day, and all I want to do is sleep, and my bloodsugar before I go to bed is too high or low, I will naturally start crying. I can't really control it.  If my friends are around me, they just look at me funny. I don't think they understand how hard life is with diabetes.

 

Sorry for my rant.

4

You never need to feel sorry for ranting.

It is very important that we as a community of T1 Diabetics help each other just by reading and replying to posts, like yours.

For 33 years as a T1 diabetic, i have been through allot of misunderstandings from family to friends.  I believe that people will only understand this disease if they themselves have diabetes or they are forced to learn, because a family member needs management.

But there is hope!!!!!!!!

"I will make change" . It is sad to say, but people will listen to entertainers or athletes.    So guess what ????????

I will be producing a DVD to be released in 2009  that will help the general population to, "understand", the disease.

 

Your Spuddy

 

5

My friends are a lot like that but it's more "should I get someone to help with your low?" or "can you eat that" but most of the time, they don't really care if have diabetes and sometimes encourage me to skip dosages. it is really weird but they also want to help. They also love to tell their friends "she has diabetes" and they feel all big and special because I am the only one they know with it. They feel so cool. I wish I could feel like them sometimes...

6

Spuddy!! That is great! The first person I will have watch your DVD (along with me) will by my friend Caitlin.

Yesterday I was telling her how excited I was about juvenation and I said "its a support group site--" and before I could finish she goes "oh, so you can complain?" I was baffled! We deal with ALOT and what is hardest about having Diabetes is that we are only 10% of the population so its very hard for people to relate. Sometimes I think I cannot even express how I'm feeling when my sugars are high and low because people think I am just complaining and she just proved my assumptions as true :-(

Sometimes I just wish people could be diabetic for a day so they know what we go through.

I will also have to buy the DVD for my dad so he will stop telling me what to eat and what not to eat!

Other than that, I just get asked if its a phone, a beeper, or an MP3 player. Sometimes it gets annoying especially when people know its a pump and ask me if I'm winning at a video game or ask what I'm listening to. I guess thats people's way of connect with me?

7

disagree. i was told it was my responsibility to help a girl who got diagnosed when we were 13...and i resented her, her mother(who originally told me i had to watch over her) and everyone else who even SUGGESTED it to me.

 

it's one thing to discuss diabetes with another diabetic, it's a whole other thing to "take care of" another diabetic. you have your own health to worry about..you really don't need to be worrying about someone else's unless they are your partner, parent, sibling or child.

8

I had something similar happen to me when I was in middle school. Our school nurse wanted me to talk to a younger girl about diabetes and help her with her issues, but no one was around to help me with mine! I know it sounds selfish, but it was a difficult time to be living with diabetes (not to mention I was super shy about it), so it was difficult for me to accept trying to help others. I wish there would have been something like this site when I was younger!

As for being a nurse, that's an excellent idea. I work on an inpatient unit that happens to take care of newly diagnosed children, and I talk with them and their parents all the time (although I am not a nurse). It is a good feeling to be able to help others.

AS for understanding, we need more understanding in the world. My biggest annoyance is people that assume I like needles! I just consider it something I have to do, not something I enjoy. But I do love when people ask me questions regarding my insulin pump!!

9

I think it is great that your friends want to help you. If it annoys you sometimes just be honest, thank them for helping and tell them you got it from here.

If you really want to help people and become a nurse I say go for it!

 

 

10

I know a few people like this too. As annoying as it can be for me I try and remember that they are just saying these things because they love me. I have moments when I want to snap at these people too, like Gina said I find that thanking them works best :)

11

Cure4all, you are not alone. I am grateful for the few people who have enough humility to ask or theorize only about experiences that they have actually never been through, rather than play act as though they have. Unfortunately, most people have learned that it is never okay to openly admit ignorance or insecurity, so they take up defense mechanisms by playing expert, acting arrogant, assuming other people's boundaries to be negotiable, or speaking/acting offensively.

Sometimes, I just pass it off...and I have seen people have an odd, odd way, sometimes, of trying to bond over things. I completely miss the point sometimes. I think that what you are describing may in part be human nature in its unfettered glory...sometimes. Sometimes, I suspect that people feel oddly alone with a person w/T1 when they know just enough to realize how...what's the word...how all encompassing it actually is, how sick it can make anyone with it feel...as though they sense that there is this element that they'd like to and at the same time not like to mess with themselves.

If they are friends, real friends, they will have mixed up feelings about your existence with T1...when I was your age, no one really liked to bring certain feelings out in the open, which was depressing, really. It won't be an attitude as much as something they can't really name; I tend to think, from personal experience, that a rigid attitude toward others is generally only a shield, and a flimsy one at that...and the best friend of all will try, somehow, to level the playing field, not only between you and him or her, but T1 as well.

You are refining the art of being a friend as you tolerate and set boundaries with those who, by the way, may feel helpless, too. Your post made me think about how I feel when I can help someone else; it feels like relief, somehow...from what, I'm not sure...but it is freeing to feel like I am contributing and helping out.

Don't assume that anyone is out for the worst, even though it may be right there for anyone to see...this is also from personal experience. There are good people in the world who may act poorly sometimes. Just be yourself. You're helping your friends, even the misguided ones, if you can allow them to learn their own lessons.