To start, I don’t know anyone who has diabetes. Except for one girl who is a senior at my school and we don’t like ever talk. But, anyways, I feel so alone because I don’t talk to anyone who actually understands me. I get frustrated easily about silly things; none of my friends understand. They all think that diabetes is no different. I get so stressed having to take shots for food and checking my sugar all the time. They all try to deal with it too. Like they look over my shoulder at my number and they scold me, but they don’t even know where my sugars should be. Also, they assume that their life are sooooooo much harder than mine because they don’t eat less than whatever calories it’s supposed to be. They’re always telling me how it must be easier because I have a certain amount of carbs that I can have.
When I tell them that I had to go to the Endo four times a year, they’re always telling my about their physical and how it’s exactly the same. haha. no. No it’s not.
I think I’m just tired of shots and pricks and uneducated people and extra doctor visits and nighttime lows and… all of it. Just all of it. I don’t know how much longer I can take it and it’s been only 1093 days. Almost 3 years. In 3 days it will have been 3 years… I’m trying to decide how to spend that day. Sunday.
I am sorry you are feeling this way right now. But, use your experiences as a learning opportunity. They don’t understand because they don’t go through it, sometimes that is a tough thing for people to grasp. Try not to think about it too much when they say things. There were so many times when I would get mad at friends and family myself but, then I just started to blow it off. Some wanted to learn some just wanted to hear themselves talk. Roll it off your shoulders.
You have every right to be tired of it, all of us do no matter how long or short we have diabetes it just stinks. Living with a chronic health condition is difficult if it didn’t bother you then I would worry but you are a human being we go through all of the emotions all of the time. There are days when you are completely fine and days you hate it so much it ruins your entire day. If it keeps you down, I highly suggest trying to talk to a therapist specializing in people with diabetes. When I was in therapy it helped so much, they taught me ways to de-stress and what was exactly triggering my problems. Hopefully, you will be able to get out of your rut on your own but until then we are all here to listen!
Hang in there!
Gina
All I can add to Gina’s post is a thought. When you’re in high school, it’s such an intense experience, especially socially. There are cliques, peer pressure, dating, and confusion about all the things you’re feeling as your body changes and grows. It may not help much now, but in a few years, all that stuff will not matter. You’ll remember some of those experiences, some of which will be positive and some negative. But for me and many others, our lives began after high school ended. You will learn so much about yourself and develop your own individual values and strengths, not based on how others have labeled you. If your friends say something snarky (and if they are regularly snarky, you might want to transition to some new friends!) just ignore them, or take the time to educate them, but only if they are the type that will be worth your time. As Gina says, hang in there!
Hi there!
I completely understand.
I am a junior and there’s one other kid in my grade who’s a type 1 and I’ve never spoken to him.
It’s understandable why your friends don’t understand (mine don’t either), but hey, they could cut us some slack huh? I’m the same way, I get frustrated over little things sometimes. It’s hard when you’re falling asleep in class because you had to wake up 3 times to eat or when you can’t focus because you’re high/low.
Unfortunately I’ve come to realize that most people will never understand what it entails. Even parents don’t always understand just how frustrating it is, especially mentally.
Just remember to cut yourself some slack!! I’m sure you are doing amazing!
All diabetics have their ups and downs (no pun intended…), but push through! If you have a crap day, just wake up the next morning and remember you have been dealt a hard hand, you just have to play the best you can.
Stay strong!
If you want someone to talk to, or rant to (trust me we all need a good rant), feel free to message/email me!
I get it, one time my science teacher was being rude (as always) and she was angry that I was gone, but I leave at the same time every day to go do my daily check and I come right back. I was trying to explain this to her and she said how I was telling her my sob story and its not that big of a deal. I seriously wanted to go crazy on her butt but I refrained and pretty much just cried when I got home because she embarrassed me infant of my classmates and she made me feel horrible, and then I got so angry. I told my mom all of what happened and my mom, being the mom she is went straight to the teacher and told her off. (GO MOM!)
Sometimes I really wonder what people thing when I tell them diabetes and what they think about it. I always get so embarrassed when we are talking about a topic in school and the word diabetes comes up and of course they associate it with the McDiabetes kind and as soon as people here that word they look at me. I just want to put a sign on my head that says MY PANCREAS STOPPED WORKING, I DID NOT EAT MYSELF AWAY TO GET THIS STUPID DISEASE. I know its probably stupid but I get so angry when people don’t differ T2 and T1. Most people don’t know the freaking difference and it makes me so self conscious about myself because they think I have the fat kind. And me being the 14 year old girl that I am, I am always self conscious about my body and weight. When me and my friends get together we all talk about out insecurities just like every girl ever. When ever I complain about my body or anything they say “well its different for you because you have diabetes and have to eat like all the time” LIKE SERIOUSLY ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME I WANT TO PUNCH THEM IN THE FACE ON A DAILY BASIS.
I know I just get angry that people don’t know what it feels like. Sometimes I wish that the people around me could have it just for a couple of days and then they would really know what I have to go through for the rest of my life.
I just get so angry and I want to be left alone a lot of the time and I think that I haven’t really grasped the idea that I have to take care of myself and I’m going to have to deal with this for forever and that scares me a whole lot because I don’t want anything worse like liver failure, amputations, or not being able to have kids. That scares the hell out of me and just typing this right now is scaring me and I just want to forget that I have this disease all together. My parents continue to tell me that I should see somebody, and Im thinking that now I should because it is getting really hard lately.
Im going to continue to try to hang in there!
Dear WarriorKit,
People have no idea. They are ignorant to the facts of TD1. After all these years I still get the “Diabetes Police” telling me what to do. “YOU CAN’T HAVE THAT” BLAH BLAH BLAH. I hate when I’m in a bad mood and the first thing someone says is “Check yourself”. Thats why its SOOO cool to talk with another TD1. It’s exciting to talk with someone who gets it. We should have meetings. Why can’t we get hospitals in areas to have a place to gather? We can call it “Diabetes Unanimous” We can sit and bitch to people who get it. I’m in Chicago, where is everyone else from?