Hi all you parents of teens out there. I am happy we have a new group - teens are quite a bit different than other younger kids.
Here's some discussions I wouldn't mind having. Do you want to start one? Start one in a new discussion post.
Does anyone else have trouble letting their teen be as independent as they should. I am always so worried, I hope I am not turning him into a mommas boy.
How do your kids carry thier supplies. In the past week Alec has lost his entire insulin pack at school, and then a few days later he lost his meter. There has to be some "cool" way a teen boy can carry his stuff.
I am worried becuase Alec never wants to talk or share about his disease. He won't talk about other than what we need to (#s, doasage..). I think it would help him to interact with other teens going through this but he just won't. Do you see this too?
hi Mom E , My daughter was 12 when she got type1.Then came the teen years and living them with d. It has not always been easy for her or me. She has had more time to adjust to d than your son. I am sure you both are still working through it all. I understand that now that my daughter too is 18,I will have to give her more independence like she wants. After all, that's what I want her to be independent one day.....but,and look out for the but,ha...I see it this way,a mom never stops being a mom..till the day she dies...and that mom on Raymond-maybe she's not so bad-she shows a lot of love :) My daughter may go off to college,one day get married,etc...and when she calls or comes home--I will go into mother mode :) But for now and while she's still at home,I am going to parent....and I think they expect us to :)
Our boys are about the same - mine is 13 and diagnosed 11/09. I think it is hard enough finding the proper balance of parenting/independence at this age...then to have this new diagnosis thrown into the mix.. Just think though of how much they have taken on and had to face. I think it will make them stronger and more capable at a young age. (and if a little bit of mommying at some points eases that burden I am ok with that! ) I don't think my ds would ever be considered a momma's boy, but it is nice that on occasion he still needs me!
hi Helfen , I don't know what it is like for a boy to have type 1. I have a girl...and I feel the same way about talking about d.I could never get her still to talk about it.It worried me-Why doesn't she want to just have a good long talk about things.How she feels,how are things going etc..nope-not going to happen.Atleast so far..I can think of 2 xs she really poured out her heart. Once about 3 years into this d world-she just started talking and told me how she felt being in the hospital and hearing that she had type1...and then realizing this was not going away.This was something she would have to live with...since then.she will talk in little burst and then quickly move on from it.That has worked for both of us...The other time she really poured out her feelings was to a guy she met.Same age as her-same year found out he had d...and they really were so thankful to find each other.They talked over an hour here at the house about everything they had experienced with type1.I wanted to cry-I was so relieved that she found someone that understood life with type 1 and her age too. I want every type 1 child and teen and even adult to connect with one or better yet many others -it's healing I believe :)
I wish my son were a little MORE dependent. Not really, but that not-fully-developed frontal lobe and I keep banging heads about how important control is. For example, before the National Honor Society induction a couple of weeks ago, I talked to him before we went. I posited that there would probably be punch and cookies and that is would be a good idea to inject between the ceremony and the reception. He agreed. But we get there and he decides not to inject. 20 minutes later, up he walks munching on cake and sipping punch. And sent his blood sugar soaring. Grrr.
My son's supplies are a wreck. He has one main box that he keep stuff in and it's constantly shuffled between school backpack or a JDRF backpack that we got in the hospital (that has a cool insulated pocket in the back). USUALLY, he has what he needs and if he isn't going to school, has the JDRF backpack. He doesn't seem to mind it. I've asked if he wants me to buy him anything less obvious, but he doesn't seem to mind. But keeping the supplies neat and orderly is not one of his priorities. It was causing a problem with going through too many supplies, so now we keep the bulk and he has to come ask for more (I need needles). And while we will never punish him for diabetes or numbers, he does lose the iTouch if there are uncapped used needles in public areas of the house.
My son doesn't like to talk about diabetes. WHY do we have to TALK about it!?!?! He doesn't hide it. He's been very open with his friends and injects publicly. (Lately, that also includes through his jeans!!!) But he feels no need to talk about it and violently is opposed to the idea of talking with a diabetic specialist about what he is feeling. (We've brought this up because he confessed one bad night to feel stressed out by the unrelenting diabetes.) And I asked him pointblank a couple of weeks ago if his lack of interest in tight control was an effort at trying to ignore diabetes. He would have never said this on his own, but I hit the nail on the head and he agreed. But he doesn't want to TALK about it.
I think it is kinda a teen mentality ...if were not talking about it, then it is no big deal.
Maybe they need it to not seem like the BIG deal it is so they can cope. I personally don't know how I would have done having the burden and knowing the rest of my life will be this way (too much for even an adult).
I don't push him to talk too much, he knows I do all my research and and will inform him of things he needs to know about in small bite size pieces
PS he lost his entire case again Monday. What to do with this boy?
Angie - I bet your son will eventually come around to taking care of himself like you know he should and can. He must be a very smart guy....NHS right?
I bet you are just so frustrated thinking about what he is doing to himself.
Our daughter carries her supplies in a purse, not a solution for boys however. Our friends carry their supplies (only his meter and some tabs) in his cargo pants pocket. that seems to work for him. otherwise there is a one shoulder back pak that ll bean makes that might work for a boy. and no, we do not carry glucagon. even if she did and was severely low and having a seizure, who would administer it ? not a necessity to carry around as far as I am concerned
Our daughter has been a type 1 since 5 years old. she is now 14 and I still worry all the time. she has never had a severe low to use glucagon - but it is still a daily sometimes hourly worry about her. example is - bad mood--wondering if she is high --- I think we all just want them to stay healthy and prevent complications.
I think it is very uncomfortable for especially boys to talk about this. if you could find another, older teen that might work, or you could send him to a professional who has experience helping children cope with this. Dont' know if any of this helps
Karenmom - thanks. Yes anything helps. I am happy to hear you never needed glucagon. Still being relatively new to this I don't know if it is normal thing or not to actually use it. That's what scares me - will we need it once a year, once in his life, never, ???? As hard as we work to keep his #s in check he is still sometimes all over the place - I'm hoping for never.
Helfen: Never is great. Being new or used to it, diabetes that is, the worry does not go away, unfortunately. We, as moms must give our kids the knowledge and pray they will use it when they need it. Our daughter has had diabetes for 10 years now. yikes, time goes really fast. she took to the pump becasue she hates needles so it works for her because the pin stick is only lx every 3 days. It might be possible that your son may see he might want it. Does he know the young Jonas brother is diabetic. He uses the OMNI-POD pump, maybe something to think about in his future.
caring for someone with type 1 is like keeping a feather in the air. it can be done but it becomes exhausting. we, as humans are trying to regulate what is a involuntary response in the body, so even though we can TRY and control it is still an hourly battle to keep the glucose in check. it is a miracle we are able to have such good management of this awful disease these days, and our kids will not die young, go blind or lose a kidney becuse they will keep their Alc at 7 or below. I do hope that you have a fabulous diabetes nurse educator that will partner with you and your son to his health in check. We started with a great team, she closed her practice, went to another nearby team, who were terrible at helping me or helping us to feel like it was a partnershp; so we are now at a fabulous practice with a great doctor and awesome educator but they are at least 40 miles away. it is worth it. please find someone who can help you help him manage this. - - our main mission for our child is to prevent a low. so far that has worked, her Alc is at 7.2 and that is excellent. we have found a team who is there for us and that helps tremendously. bless you and your family