Sometimes I wonder

I'm just so mad and frustrated right now. They always say "You didn't do anything to get diabetes". Well how can they know that when they don't even know for SURE what causes it in the first place? WHY?! My first year of diabetes ive never had a sugar over 250 now i'm well into my second year with it and 250 is all i seem to be at no matter what I do! Why is my control suddenly gone? WHY?

 I am extremely frustrated because it's already been a horrible week. My blood sugar's been high nonstop and I just about want to throw my pump out a window, curl up in a little ball and hide from the world. Just great now I feel low. Will this feeling ever stop? :(

Ugh. Any help please? :'(

Hi Elena,

I am sorry to hear about your frustration. You don't mention your insulin regimen but If you are high a lot you probably just need to figure out some new

adjustments. Your honeymoon is over and it gets a little tougher because your insulin needs are going up.

Make sure your insulin is fresh and not going bad from being open too long or exposed to heat. try getting some aerobic exercise every day for a few days and fee if that helps brig it down too, 250isn't so bad for a few days only. Once you figure it out you will be fine. 

Hi Elena,

I would talk with your endo or your CDE about reviewing your numbers. Our clinic just lets us email, fax, or even call them in. As Terry mentioned, your honeymoon has or is ending and so your body is needing more insulin. I have usually found with my son that when he is consistently high over a few days that increasing his basal rates on his pump is what is needed, but everyone is different.

Also - we all get that D is an extremely emotional disease. I know it is hard to share your frustrations some times but that is why we are all here. THere are definitely days that will be extra sucky. It can get better. Just keep on going. You can do it!

Elena, did you have a good pump trainer? Do you understand insulin:carb ratios, insulin sensitivities, insulin on board, etc? The book "Pumping Insulin" by John Walsh has helped many pumpers to have good control.  It sounds like you need many adjustments on your pump.

Another possibility is that you are not rotating your sites enough. If you keep using the same body part repeatedly, scar tissue can develop beneath the skin surface, and there is poor absorption of the insulin, which will cause high blood sugar like you are experiencing. I use my abdomen for a few weeks and keep my sites about 1 1/2 inches apart. Then i use my upper legs so my abdomen can completely heal. the healing time (a few weeks) will take care of ant scar tissue that may have started to form.

elena-

hang in there. i can't even imagine how overwhelmed and frustrated you must be.  coping with diabetes can be so emotionally draining.

i know it seems hopeless right now, but YOU CAN DO THIS!!! have you talked to your endo or CDE about how you're feeling? it sounds like some of your settings may need to be adjusted.

and if you don't feel supported by your endo, you may want to see someone different.

let us know if there's anything else we can do. you are not alone!

It feels great to read this from you because I have been going through the exact same experience. I have had it for a little over a year and had it 'under control' up until 3 months ago. Ive been higher than I ever have, yet I'm not eating any worse. I have an endo appointment coming up and I know I am going to just break down. I don't know what to do other than try increasing my doses on my pump. The other day I had a high of 260 then 3 hours later it was 42. wtf?!  The hardest part is realizing that it never goes away. I feel like I am starting all over with the diagnosis right now. Anyway, hang in there! Just wanted to let you know that I am going through what sounds like the same thing. Absolutely no one around me knows what I am going through, it means so much that you shared your frustrations.

Hi Elena--

Sounds like your "honeymoom period" is over. Hang in there. Talk to your CDE or Endo and they will get things figured out. At least your honeymoon ended after 2 years....I just got diagnosed this past October and my honeymoon ended at the beginning of April. So, yeah...I know how you feel. Things will pan out, just keep positive, okay? It'll work out....just a speed bump.

--Kelly