Even though it has been 8 years since I was diagnosed, been through a multitude of problems and complications, have had my whole world turned around from diabetes, I can't shake the thought that I will never get used to things! Is this a normal thought to many other T1's? I understand that things will never go back to the way it was and I am only going to become stronger, but I feel as I am weak at times for not fully accepting of this. How have some of you overcome this thought process??
It has been 8 yrs for me as well. I have also been struggling. I think it is harder when you are diagnosed later because you always think about what it WAS like before you got diabetes. I felt weak for so many years after even now sometimes. I just think what is wrong with me why cant I accept it like everyone else does. I just had to deal with it when i was ready to. Even if it did take 7 years! You arent crazy or anything. Diabetes isnt easy and every day is different. I have a new mentality though, I tell myself that tomorrow will be better than today when i have a bad day and that has been working for me.
if you need anything let me know. you can personally send me private messages if you feel like you need to talk privately about it.
Jess,
What??? You may not get used to shoving pieces of metal in your body, making your fingers bleed for sport, having to do calculations every time you want to put food in your mouth, worrying about whether you gave enough insulin to cover that quick snack or if you gave too much or whether it is safe to sleep… and… ummm… Okay, I’ve been at this over 25 years – You aren’t weak if you think about getting rid of this nonsense – you are SANE! I have so many goofy habits built into my life around this disease that I wonder whether I’ll be able to shake ‘em if someone does come up with a cure but WHOOOO is that a problem I would love to have to face. I read your blog – you may be one of the strongest people I’ve heard from in a lot of years. If you need things to worry about, I am sure you can find them but I have to be honest, I don’t think strength is an issue for you. You are getting to the business of living your life through the struggles of this disease and the ridiculous litany of complications that have been thrown your way. I find your story and your strength to be inspiring.
As for overcoming the natural tendency to want to be done with the relentless onslaught of blood-sugar-mania: I read a lot, I am curious and I am hopeful about anything and everything that may or will be helpful in treating diabetes and/or diminishing its effects. It’s my defense against the quiet hours with this illness. Also, I have found that reaching out and talking to other diabetics who are earlier on in their journey and sharing what I’ve seen can be very helpful to the end of keeping my own head on straight.
I have many gifts, unfortunately, concision is not one of them- sorry for taking hundreds of words to say what I could probably have gotten done in just a few…
One final thought: We have enough to contend with without beating up on ourselves… Or, as my dad used to say "Don't should on yourself!" J
Cheers!
A-D
Your not weak at all, oh my god. I think we all fantasize about what life would be like without diabetes at times, it's totally normal to have trouble accepting it. I think you have a great attitude towards it, in that you keep getting stronger. I'm not going to lie what you've had to deal with seems incredibly tough, so if anything you are stronger than most of us.
I completely understand where you are coming from. For me, it has been almost 6 years. I was pregnant with my daughter and my gestational diabetes never went away. I go through times that I am really angry with diabetes and recall what life was like without it and then I have other times in which I think that I have a handle on dealing with it. You are not weak at all!
Your feelings are perfectly normal. And, your feelings are going to shift and change over time, many times. I was 17 when I was diagnosed, so I completely know and recall my pre-diabetic life, and how much easier it all was. But that was almost 24 years ago. I've had those feelings of "ok, I'm done with this, let's just stop testing and poking and counting and worrying and testing and poking and...." Still to this day, I get sick of it.
But now....it feels "normal" to do these things, even if it's frustrating.
So yes, it will feel "normal" to you, if it doesn't now, and that feeling of being encumbered to such a high level may feel a bit less so with more time.
Just think....when a cure comes around (likely before you hit a 24 yr mark!) we'll all have to get used to a whole new normal!
Hey, it's okay. I've only been diabetic for a few years now, but I try to feel normal. I try to get friends, I eat out, I play games.
You're different, no doubt. Embrace it. Don't let it get you down and out.
Everything can be normal, as long as you try.
Don't draw attention to it. Do the test under the table.
<3Sara