Diabetes, Tourette's, and Depression. Ahhhh!

Coping & Support
1

Hi. New-ish member: 20 yrs. old. T1 for about 10 years, twin sister and dad are also T1. Pretty awesome life, but I still get really down sometimes :(

I'll explain. I have a really ridiculously amazing life. I know I am very blessed, and I'm grateful for every day I am alive :) But I've always really been down about my diabetes.

Let's start here maybe. My life's not all totally awesome :( I've got the diabetes thing going on, but I've also been on meds for depression for a few years, and I've got Tourette's. Random, I know.

Well, once I got all of the doses and stuff for my antidepressants worked out and went to therapy, the depression became manageable. It's not even a big issue for me anymore unless I forget my meds.

And Tourette's was kind of an interesting journey too. TS is kind of cool actually, but tiring mainly, inconvenient sometimes, and embarrassing usually. lol. But my diagnosis of this has actually lead me on a wonderful path of self-learning and self-acceptance. I've learned to love myself and others more for it. I am soooo grateful to have it, and hey, it keeps things interesting ;-)

But no such luck with diabetes... I'm angry at it all the time, full of self-pity, defensive, etc. Big range of different negative emotions. I've seen a therapist recently because my endocrinologist made me really really mad and I had violent thoughts. Not like me! I promise.

I just seem to always get stuck on the unfairness of it all. And unlike my other things, I cannot seem to turn it into a positive in my life. It's not like I'm not self-aware, you know? I know when I'm indulging in self-pity or anger or denial. I just get tired of the doctors always telling me I'm not good enough. I hate testing my BS because if I'm high, I hate myself and I'm already a pretty harsh critic. And then when the doctors say I'm not good enough, I just get mad because I ALREADY KNEW THAT! I need help! Anyone have some advice on how I can turn this into a positive?

2

Hi fplan......do some new doctor/endo searching.....you don't need a doc who is going to tell you that you aren't good enough.  Don't ever let ANYONE tell you that!!  I have been diabetic since I was 10......I'm now 35.  Diabetes has been a really tough road for me...I cannot even begin to imagine have Tourette's also.  I have depression issues myself...I blame that mostly on the diabetes.  I can tell just by reading your post that you are an amazing person.  I admire you for all that you have been through. 

Living with diabetes can be a job in of itself.  You just have to try to start taking one day at a time.  That's my focus.  There will be good days and there will be bad days, which I am sure you are aware of.  But please try to start right now with putting yourself on a pedestal!  You are an exceptional person and I am sure that you have a lot of talents! 

You have come to a great place.  Many people here are very supportive and offer lots of help/advice.  You are not alone!  Keep smiling:)

3

Handling one diagnosis is difficult. I am absolutely amazed at your positive attitude with three! As Angela mentioned, you are exceptional. Give yourself applause for being so calm and cool. A lot of us only have to live with D - you have already impressed me :o) The ability to laugh at yourself is a tremendous quality to have.

For everyone, how they manage their disease(s) and corresponding emotions is unique. Most of us go through the grieving process. For me, I got stuck on anger and denial. It took me quite some time to get out of it. As I said, everyone handles it differently. For myself, it was the realization "this is now my life." No matter how hard I fight it, how much I hate it, how much anger I throw towards it, I won't be able to wish it away. I was diagnosed young, and even though I'd had diabetes 20 years now, I am still young. I have a lot of years to live with diabetes, and I decided I wasn't going to spend them angry and not taking care of myself.

I am also lucky enough to have a wonderful support system. My doctor is wonderful - she is honest with me, treats me as an adult and an equal, and listens to my problems and what I have to say. My family and friends are the same. Even though they don't live with the disease, they have empathy and are there to support me on the days I need it. I have also found wonderful support and friends here through Juvenation. You have made a wonderful start by coming here. I can't imagine my life without Juvenation!

Also on a point Angela made, have you ever spoken with your endo outright and honestly about your care? When I go to my endo appointments, and I know my care wasn't the best, I told my doctor that. I let her know when I was struggling with blood testing and depression and just plain didn't give a shit. She listened to what I have to say and then worked with me on attempting to make it better. She understands it's not going to be perfect, but because we have open communication I think she has more respect for those times when I'm really trying and those times when I'm simply struggling. If your endo can't get ahold of that, you might consider making a switch (if that's a possibility). You don't deserve to be treated that way.

Welcome to Juvenation. Congratulations on making one of the best decisions of your social-networking career :o) Recognizing you are struggling with your diagnosis, regardless of how long you've had it, is the first step and often the most difficult. We are here to help you and take those steps with you. Good luck to you - I hope you are able to find the frienship, support, and advice you are looking for. :o)

4

Thanks so much to both of you! Reading these really made my night. I am just really touched you guys took the time to write such wonderful messages! Maybe this was what I've been missing? Juvenation seems like a lovely place. From the browsing I've done, there are a ton of really really great people here with such helpful and encouraging things to say. I already feel more ready to take this on :-)

This is the best welcome ever :D Thanks again guys.

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Keep postin so we know how you are doin!  Hang in there.....we're here for ya!  Through the good and the bad! 

6

Ok i dont know much about tourette's or depression because ive never gone through them but diabetes is a differant story...

          I know how you feel about the doctors tell you that your not good enough well you are!They tell you that so that you will try harder and i know i shouldnt really be replying to anyones becuase im not in a good state myself but haveing Diabetes is kinda like a new adventour its a pain in the butt but you have to live through it. Im only 12 and i just got my diabetes on the 30th of October so i dont know a hole lot. But in my time of having diabetes ive learned from it. Ive realized that yes im differant and i cnt have candy that the teachers hand out but i will kno myself inside and out. I dont know about you but i think its kinda kewl that we can have syptoms and we can feel what happens and we know more than the regular people. They dont know about diabetes. We do. Anyone i tell that i have diabetes they dont get it. They say ok whats that? Well to me it gets annoying! But i dont see a bright side to having diabetes but dont make it something that you completely hate. Otherwise its like hating yourself. There is NO GOOD REASON to EVER EVER EVER hate yourself. Make the best of life no matter you have one friend or 30 million. Embrace yourself and show off that you have diabetes. It is a disadvantge but push yourself and youll see youll learn to appricatie it.

           I hope i helped a little bit coming from some1 that hasnt had it too long.

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shannon, you might only be 12, but you have some very good advice. way to go.

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[quote user="C"]

shannon, you might only be 12, but you have some very good advice. way to go.

[/quote]

No kidding! Shannon, you're awesome. I never thought about how much more we are in touch with our bodies. That is such an amazing insight. It makes me way more at peace to think about my body needing me to take care of it. Before I used to think that my body was just lazy, or that it hated me or something. It's almost like we're a team though, you know?

Wow. Thanks so much! You've got a good head on your shoulders girl. Keep being awesome!

9

You just have to hold on sometimes. If you're having alot of trouble with it, talk to your friends and make sure they know you want some support. I'm only 12 and have now had it for 6 to almost 7 years. Sometimes I have to really think, is it all worth forgetting to check my sugar or something? Yet, nothing has happened to me in 6 years. And if you have faith in yourself, nothing will happen to you either =]