Shared custody with a newly diagnosed child

Hello, my step daughter was diagnosed with T1diabetes in Sept. My husband and I have been her primary caregivers. When he got divorced there was no custody agreement. It was decided to be 50/50. It is more like 80/20. I pack her school lunches everyday and we have done well with keeping her sugars in range. She has recently been able to spend more time at her mothers. She packed her school lunches 3 days in a row and 2 of those days the school nurse called us at lunch time because her sugar was in the 60’s. We are pretty sure it was because of the difference in breakfast and snacks that were given at her mothers house and packed for school. The nurse was concerned. Called the hotline that was provided by her MD for questions. They decided that we should change her insulin ratio from 1 unit : 25grams to 1 unit :40 grams. I am really concerned that they suggested this change. They didn’t have a clear picture as to why she was so low for 3 days. I am sure it was because of the circumstances. Are there any parents that have shared custody that can help me figure out ways to keep things more consistent for our daughter? Honestly, we’ve already mentioned to her mother the things that she hasn’t done and she doesnt change anything.

I guess what I am looking for are other parents who share custody and how you manage to keep everything consistent from house to house?