and I am so tired. On 12-15-09 I ran my 9 year old daughter to the ER. She was almost completely none responsive. They got her right back tested her blood sugar and it was over 500 and they said the words "she is diabetic" I went numb. They air lifted her to a childrens hospital with a picu about 45 min from my home. Thank goodness for family my sister in law drove me up there while my husband got our two boys from school (they are high functioning autistic have adhd and absence seizures 11 and twins) to leave them with his brother so he could join me. The medic on the copter called me about 10 min before we got there to tell me they made it and there were no changes. She was one of the longest kids they had on drips her potassium and such were so messed up. I am sure you all know the bum rush of info you get at the hospital and I am sure its the same who catch it before that trip. It was and still is overwhelming. They released her friday after lunch. I feel like I know enough for now but nothing at all at the same time. I dont get how I will ever just know how much insulin to give her in the future or how to adjust it on our own. Our case manager is great and I want her forever lol. I dont want to have to know all of this or have to be this much more responsible for keeping her alive. I am a parent not a medical professional. It scares me that this is added to my already packed job title as a mother. I know its only been a week and I have to give myself a break thats why I am here getting it all out to others who I think may understand.
Anyhow she just had her first episode of low blood sugar and I freaked out gave her her lunch cause it was time and I remember someone saying or us reading if it was meal time to feed her. Well about 10 min later I tested her again and it was still dropping so I gave her 4 oz of juice made her stop eating and tested her again 15 min later and let her finish eating cause it was going back up. I am sure I did a bunch of things wrong in there and feel guilty over it now. I am sure I am going to make her spike with the extra 15ish grams of carbs and then will kick myself again. Tho we are still adjusting her insulin trying to figure out what she needs daily. Ugh I dont know someone tell me I am not the worst mother in the world for how I treated it. I guess that is more than enough for one post. Forgive me I am trying to hold it together for so many and am just so tiered.