Need a suggestion,its very depressing......plzzz

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1

Hiiiiiii everyone,

       Im 23yr old doctor,with type1.Its been 5yrs im diagnosed wit type 1.I have avery good doctors family background and im very happy wit wat i have(regarding DM).My blood sugar levels are always under very good control and i dont even remember that im a diabetic and my family also dont remember that im wit DM.

         While everything is going well wit my life,i just finished my graduation and according to my parents wish i got married(arranged marriage) this march 2012,and thts d reason why im suffering alot.I dont know why guys behave in such a stupid way when their wife is diabetic.Before performing marriage my parents informed everything about diabetes to the guy parents and to him and wit all the enquiries they agreed to marry me.

         Now its not even past 2months of our marriage(my husband is an engineer) we both had a very good time for 20days after our marriage.after that he left me to his work place telling me that il search a house and take you there.After he left there he slowly stopped talking to me and after a lot of struggle he came to his hometown and when asked regarding this he's telling that he got sum fear tht the disease is very serious and if anythng happens to me how can he make me survive.At that tym my brother(he's a doctor doing his second year post graduation)asked him what fears are you having regarding my sister DM,and he's is not willing to tell anything abt that but only telling that im worried worried worried.I dont understand onething im just 23 and how can he ask if anything happens and v all know pretty well that nothing will be wrong when our bloodsugar levels are under very good control.

        So now he's asking to write all the dowry which was told by my father to register as joint account on both of our name so that he can take care of me whenever needed.And while telling that his father mentioned that if at all in any case i die then the property should belong to my husband,because of that sentence told by his dad my parents were scared that after writing the property if they are planning to kill me.

      After all this talks are finished both of our parents,told to my husband to talk to me properly as earlier and they kept one date for taking me to his place in the mean tym the registration will be done,and after that he went back to his work place and now when im calling to him he's not responding properly only telling that im sleeping or going to eat talk to u later.somehow by his talks i understood that he's avoiding to talk.My problem is that he wont share anything wit me.

      PLZ PLZ PLZ give me a suggestion wat to do now.but plz dont suggest me to break up wit my husband  and stay alone i cannot do that i loved him alottt and i want my husband back as earlier.Im not able to concentrate on anything and im very depressed.plz plz plz suggest me wat should i do to get back to my husbands love.PLZ SUGGEST ME AND HELP ME REGARDING THIS.WAITING FOR UR REPLY 

                                                                                                                                                                                                    WITH LOADS OF PAIN

                                                                                                                                                                                                           Sweety.

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Oh Sweety,

I am so sorry to hear what you’re going through. My heart is breaking for you.

I really don’t know what to tell you, except that your husband needs to find a way to accept you as you are. Maybe some marriage counseling would help? Diabetes shouldn’t be an issue in your marriage – I know many people with diabetes who are happily married and with children. You obviously have to take care of yourself and your diabetes, and your husband should understand how to help you in an emergency, but it shouldn’t cause what you’re going through.

All I can suggest is to find a way to get some counseling. If he’s pulling away, and you want to make your marriage work, then you have to find a way to connect with him and may need some help from a professional.

Best of luck to you,

Michelle

3

hmmm thank you Michelle for ur concern

         even i want that but he's not at all getting open to me i dont know why he's doing so....anyway il find a way to get connected to him.

   thanks alot.

  sweety.

4

I think you may need some protection from outside your family. Perhaps this site can help you. www.indiatogether.org/.../resources.htm

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thank you....terry will checkout but i dont want to break the relation i want to continue so waiting for him..

  anywayz thanks alot........

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If you were a westerner or my daughter I would tell you that the relationship is already broken. Perhaps he will change his mind but that it out of your control. Stop calling him. Let him worry about you and wonder where you are. This is extremely important but even more importantly you need to protect yourself. Seek the advise of the experts in these matters in India before it is too late. If you are worried for your safety then you should listen to that voice in your head telling you might be in danger. If your own family can't or won't protect you then you must seek help from advocates in these matters. Women are all too often the victims of violence from their husbands and in India there is little protection from authorities.

Please be careful. You are young. You are a doctor. You still have your whole life ahead of you. One man is not worth it,

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I Know my relationship is already broken,but im not able to admit it.now  im really regreting for being an indian.if im a westerner i might hav kicked him by this tym.really need a psychiatric counselling for me for this.after seeing posts n sum inspirational quotes while browsing im fine, but if my mind is idle its depressing me.i have to take care of myself n only tht i can do now is vl wait for him till my patience is lost.if once lost il surely kick him out.n il let all of u know n vl laugh together louder.............

thank you terry.......