I need advice/support/HELP

Coping & Support
1

i was diagnosed at 16. i am now 21. i had great control of my diabetes until after i had my daughter, at 19. i have always worked full time. although i have lost many jobs BECAUSE of my diabetes. it is out of control… my last a1c was 10.8 which was a lot better than the 12 before that. i am in the process of finding a dietitian and diabetic educator. i think it would help refresh my memory on the dos and donts. anyway, i am at a point where i am feeling very frustrated. i also suffer from depression,anxiety,insomnia and fibromyalgia which make it alot harder for me to controal my blood sugar because i am always so stressed. i am raising my 3 yr old daughter alone, no help from her father.

i am now in a serious relationship with someone. but instead of trying to understand or being somewhat empathetic… he blames the highs on me. like it is something i have done. i had a high fasting bs of 486 one morning at work. i didnt eat at all… and automatically took a correction dose. by about 3 that afternoon it was down to the 200s. i am trying as hard as i can to take back control of it. my family is the same way…i dont think they have ever truly understood the disease. i just feel alone a lot of the time and i dont know any other t1ds.

2

@diabetic_angel92,

I am sorry that you feel your family isn’t supporting you. I’ve gone through being judged by family and friends as well and it makes me crazy at times. You can help to educate them that there are things out of your control at times and that no matter how hard you try at it HIGH HAPPEN. My family used to come to doctor appointments as well as nutrition classes which helped them better understand diabetes better and in turn they slowly stopped bothering me and yelling at me for eating certain foods and judging me for highs.

Take your new boyfriend with you on appointments. If he will go with you. It will definitely help him tremendously to understand what you go through a bit better. Maybe he just needs to hear it from a professional? Try not to stress because as you may or may not know they cause your blood sugars to stay higher. Try to de-stress by taking your daughter on nice long walks at the park or the beach if you live close to one. I have found that when i go on walks it really makes a difference in my physical and mental state of mind.

Hang in there we are all here and understand what you are going through. You are doing a great job! Taking care of yourself is HARD WORK! Talk to your doctors and see if maybe you need adjustments in your insulin needs. The more you keep in contact with your team the better it will be.

inbox me any time if you want to chat!

@gina

3

@diabetic_angel92

Although my family has been very supportive from the day I got diagnosed, I definitely understand your frustration.

One thing that is important to not forget is that you’re not alone! It takes a lot of hard work to control Diabetes and even under good control, you’re never perfect.

You really seem like you’re putting in a great effort to try and take a step forward towards better control and I commend you for that. A true role model in that regard. I still try and see my Dietitien a few times a year for exaclty the reason you go; to refresh my memory and stay updated. This is, of course, on top of seeing my Endo twice a year. This is just to give you an example of, in my case, someone who is under pretty good control.

@Gina 's idea of walking with your daughter is a great idea! That will definitely alleviate some of the stress that you might be experiencing. On top of that, you’ll be with the person who loves you the most!

As for the lack of support from family/significant other, education is the best solution, once again, as explained by Gina. I preach this often, as I did in a previous post on T1N; the more you educate the people around you, the more they will understand what you’re going through and will be less likely to question your decision making. If they see you under good control, they look up to you; that’s what I’ve noticed in my experience with it. Regardless of your control, the support should always be there. However, this is not the case all of the time.

With all that is going on in your life currently, you’re doing a GREAT JOB. If you put in a little work (which you’ve clearly shown you’re willing to do) it will only get better from here.

In my mind, you’re a role model already!

Keep it up, and as always, if you want to talk it out, don’t hesitate to inbox me!

4

Don’t be to hard on yourself. You’re parenting a toddler, which gives you little time for yourself.

Can you ask for you family for help watching your daughter so you can have time for taking care of your diabetes? Use that time to walk or read a great diabetes book or read posts on TypeOneNation or whatever else will help you move forward.

Your family and friends just can’t understand diabetes. Forgive them and go on. My husband LOVES me and we’ve been married 12 years but he’ll still occasionally get frustrated if I’m high or low at an inconvenient time and ask why I let it happen, like it was something deliberate. The truth is I have diabetes all the time. It’s usually well controlled but highs and lows happen. Not always when I have free time. =) I get that it’s inconvenient, but that’s life.

The awesome thing about funky blood sugars is with a little detective work you can usually figure out what the cause is.

Do you use a pump? I had a lot of crazy highs and lows that drastically diminished with a pump. If you don’t use one you may consider it. Gives lots of freedom which is invaluable as a parent.

Keep fighting the good fight and know that we’ve all been there and survived. You’ll be okay too.