My dad was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes about 5 years after I was diagnosed with type 1. I was 7 when I was diagnosed, and he was about 35. My parents are divorced and my dad can't really afford a pump, and he is not the best at controlling his blood sugars. It is really frustrating since I have a pump and am lucky enough to occasionally be able to use my CGM, and have regular endo appointments.
I found out last week that my dad has nerve damage in his eyes due to diabetes. It really scares me since I know his management won't really change, and I'm going to be devastated if someday it gets so bad that he goes blind, has nerve damage in his feet, gets heart disease, etc. :(
It's times like these that I wish for a cure the most, but I know it isn't just a magical thing that is going to pop up over night. I know things take time, but even then, what is going to happen for people who can't afford a "cure?" I know things could be worse--we are very lucky to live in the US and have access to insulin and meters, etc. but he's my dad, and your dad is always supposed to be the one who never gets sick.
I hope he gets back on track, but I still have to be realistic.
On the other hand, my student organization (newly formed!) has been doing great--we participated in the JDRF gala this past month, and we have another meeting tomorrow night to discuss more fundraising. :)
im sorry to hear about ur dad. the thing with that is, he needs to want to be healthy and live long. no one can push him to do it. u could try to get involved and go for walks with him. but how he eats is up to him. its hard to see someone go through something like this. i hope he gets better.
Hayley - I'm sorry to hear this about your dad. It is just hard seeing your parents get older and the complications that come from just getting older, much less the complications from disease, particularly one that you have too.
Maybe this will be a wake-up call for him. Or at least maybe it is an opportunity to talk with him about just 1 or 2 things that might help him. Like could you agree to text each other every time you check BGs? Or agree to at least 5 tests a day and text those? Or would he be open to you helping with some meal planning. Or if he can't afford regular medical care, could you look into finding a free clinic for him? Or even go over his numbers with him? I think it means a lot for a child to say "Dad, I love you so much and I want you in my life and healthy for as long as possible! So here's what I'd like to do to help..."
I agree with you--it is ultimately his decision. The sad part is that walks & eating better food won't necessarily change the way he manages his blood sugar. He is set in his ways, but I hope I can get through to him. Thanks for your support..
Thanks for your wonderful suggestions:) They made me feel better about the situation, although my dad can't really afford texting either, otherwise I'd love that idea. I can still send him texts, though. Maybe if I constantly sent him my good blood sugars (not that they're always perfect, haha) he'd be inspired or at least reminded to check himself.
The idea about the free clinic is also intriguing to me, but I'm not sure if there's such thing as free endocrinology appts--I'll have to look into that in my hometown. That would really help--although, he's a grown up, and I can't push him to do anything even if I think it's best for him.
I could also hijack his meter and write down all his blood sugars and help him figure out where he's having bad lows and highs--but again, I feel like he should take responsibility on his own to help himself.
Don't get me wrong, my numbers aren't always perfect either, but we've had type 1 for roughly the same time, and seeing him get complications is hard.
Thank you for your advice and suggestions :)
Hayley (p.s., Becky, you should check out my post titled something like, "Can I get a Woot Woot?(I love you, Mom!)" if you are a parent of a type 1!)
Thanks Hayley! I'm glad you find my suggestions helpful. All you can really do is talk with him and feel him out if he's bummed about the eye thing (who wouldn't be!) and just make gentle suggestions on how he could take just small steps to improve his care. More along the lines of asking questions of "What hardest for you? Remembering to check? Figuring out patterns?" Then as he picks one just make a few suggestions like I had earlier -, well, what if we texted or what if we called every night and just told each other our BGs from the day. Sometimes just the thought of not wanting to let someone else down is enough to encourage good behavior.
I wouldn't hijack his meter. I'd only look at it if he said he was having problems with keeping steady numbers or figuring out patterns. Then you could suggest looking at them together. You could be responsible for ordering a cord for his meter and bringing a laptop to download to so you can look at things together.