Fear Factor

Diabetes--Ever since my daughter got type 1....If anything goes wrong I become fearful inside.I am so tired of being weighed down with fear at these times.Maybe it is just me-until she is over a virus,etc..I stress !!To this day I will not go to the Complications group.I know what they are though....I only have this level of stress with the daughter that has type 1.Maybe it is time for Dr.Phill,ha...My question is do others deal with fear and how do you get passed it ???

I think you need to test the reality of your fears and decide whether they are appropriate to the situation.

I don't know if this is a good thing or a bad thing.  My husband taught me something early on when we were living together.  Lows will bounce.  If you are too low, your liver will kick in and dump sugar into your system.  Unless you do something to yourself while you are low (crash your car, fall down the stairs, drown in a pool) a low will not kill you as long as your liver sugar reserves don't get depleted from this happening too often.  He uses this when I am tending to be violent when I am low.  He won't let me hurt myself, but he tries to avoid getting punched, too.  As long as you are not chronically high, that won't kill you either.  Yes there are issues of complications, yes, there is the issue of being crabby or sick feeling, but as long as you are not high all of the time, you will be ok.  So, for example, if you run in the 200-300 while you are sick but have a good A1c the rest of the time, everything will probably be ok.

I know that there are a lot of people who view lows as life threatening situations, as long as being low is the only issue, you will probably be just fine.  I don't mean at all that you should not treat lows if you have the opportunity, I'm just saying you probably won't die from a low if you aren't able to treat it.

Well done, Sarah. I agree. When you think of diabetes in the long term (years/decades down the road) you never think of anything good. Just look at all the people on Juvenation who have had diabetes for 20,30,40,50+ years. A lot of them are in very good health, have families, and have lived normal lives. Diabetes does not have to be scary.

Take it a day or a week at a time. When you look too far into the future for anything, it all seems overwhelming. Your daughter is going to be fine, Meme. We all need some reassurance at times. You are worried because you care very much about her and love her. My parents were/are the same way. It's nice to be loved :o)

I fear things that have not happened yet. Like barfing I am SO scared for her to get sick and barf. I have read on how to treat her and it if she does tho. Will I have to get my book out if she gets sick yes and read over that chapter. Will she live through it well yeah but still not having to deal with it yet and knowing at some point she will get sick worries me. I am sure once we get through it once tho I will no longer fear it. I guess its more the fear of the unknown and how she will react to it that worries me the most.

If you are worried, then you are normal :) But try not to let fear get the best of you. The human body will not simply break down right away. I've had diabetes for a little over 10 years, and am in good health for my age and luckily, haven't seen any complications thus far. As you get more familiar with the disease, things will get easier and you'll be better prepared to handle any situation.. it just takes a little time and experience.

It's natural to focus on those scary "what if's". Just don't try to focus on all the negatives because those really stand out. I'm sure your daughter is completely healthy most of the time, but that 1 time she gets too high or low, it causes a lot of anxiety. You are in it for the long-haul, so try to make sure she is generally on a good regimen of insulin/testing/diet and then just deal with those extremes when they do pop up.

They're right about they human body being resilient though. Of course everyone is different, but I've been a diabetic since I was 2 (26 years almost) and I have 20/20 vision, good kidneys, good A1c's, good blood work, no circulation problems (hands/feet), and am pursuing my long-term education goals. Diabetes becomes normal and the management becomes automatic, so I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything in life.

Do you all read information on possible complications? I try to avoid them at all costs, although I've gotten better since joining this site. They scare me and I'd rather ignore them. But, maybe it's healthier to face it head on?

It's not like I have bad control or anything. I just don't like to think about *why* I'm doing it if that makes sense.

I read into them just so I know of possible symptoms to look out for, but I wouldn't say I carry a list around in my pocket to try and scare myself away from eating a cookie whenever I look at it haha

There are those fears and they dont really go away, they're there.. but once you realize youve done everything to keep numbers good, etc.. to keep healthy, theres not any other reason to worry because youve done all you can .. and as far as worrying all the time, my boyfriend [of 5years this month] was dx last year at age 19.. complete shock; a week spent at a medical center and they gave us a lot of information we felt educated, and mostly with thanks from the dietitian .. he takes Lantus at night and Novolin R as a sliding scale or cover.. along with Levothyroxine [synthroid] for hypothyroidism.. he discovered after he found out about the type1 .. and honestly, for the first 6months, we spazzed at everything, super careful.. and i know the first 2 months i hardly slept at all and definitely didnt in the hospital, afraid to sleep because he had seen the low low of 28 and hi hi at dx of 686 .. and after adjusting and being able to just look and tell if he was HI LO or "normal range" I chilled.. and him.. but it all depends; then we got a low of 28 when i hadnt stayed the night.. his parents "let him sleep" complaining he'd been up too late with tv / games / movies / etc.. and keep in mind they know not even how to use his meter let alone how much of what to give or when or even Glucagon for emergencies.. but anyway it was that low.. it scared me to death when it took me 10 minutes to wake him up; i immediately checked it when he didnt wake right up and then i gave him 7 minutes to get up and nearly had to give him the glucagon -- which i didnt want to but you feel better having it case you need to; and as an LPN now, i am totally comfortable with it.. --

bottom line.. when its new anything and everything makes you worry.. then every now and then somethin happens that makes you worry a little.. but once you're both comfortable with it and can recognize the signs well and how much of what to give to fix it and find the snacks that work best -- for instance Cinnamon graham crackers and peanut butter.. great night snack -- and also eating cinnamon on anything helps metabolize sugar =)  .. you will be more comfortable.. it takes time..

& I just wanted to let you know we were exactly the same as you are saying you are, we calmed it down eventually and now only have spazzy "moments" not months.. haha

best wishes with everything!! :)

Fear is something that strikes me mostly at night when I can not ask Emily how she is feeling- I am also afraid when she is at her Father's house and there is less communication between us about what her numbers are doing and what she is feeling.  Being diagnosed just in Nov. of 09, I guess I might mellow out a bit later, but knowing that nothing really stabilizes and we just have to do the right thing and react when we need to do something else doesn't allow me to completely relax...control freaks like me do not do well with this - but at least we know what is happening to her and we have the tools to work through whatever comes our way.

have a great day.

Christy

[quote user="Jessica "]

I fear things that have not happened yet. Like barfing I am SO scared for her to get sick and barf. I have read on how to treat her and it if she does tho. Will I have to get my book out if she gets sick yes and read over that chapter. Will she live through it well yeah but still not having to deal with it yet and knowing at some point she will get sick worries me. I am sure once we get through it once tho I will no longer fear it. I guess its more the fear of the unknown and how she will react to it that worries me the most.

[/quote]

Not to threadjack, but I'm curious as to why vomiting is bad, or seems bad upon reading your post, for diabetics?

Happens all the time...due to over exertion, sickness, or alcohol abuse. I'm still alive and healthy.

Anyone else know what the word on the street is with diabetics and puking?

[quote user="Pat"]

[quote user="Jessica "]

I fear things that have not happened yet. Like barfing I am SO scared for her to get sick and barf. I have read on how to treat her and it if she does tho. Will I have to get my book out if she gets sick yes and read over that chapter. Will she live through it well yeah but still not having to deal with it yet and knowing at some point she will get sick worries me. I am sure once we get through it once tho I will no longer fear it. I guess its more the fear of the unknown and how she will react to it that worries me the most.

[/quote]

Not to threadjack, but I'm curious as to why vomiting is bad, or seems bad upon reading your post, for diabetics?

Happens all the time...due to over exertion, sickness, or alcohol abuse. I'm still alive and healthy.

Anyone else know what the word on the street is with diabetics and puking?

[/quote]

In the book we got  being sick can make BS go really high and vomiting can make them drop really low. It makes since if you cant get any food in yourself. It also says you might need to use the glucagon like a unit at a time to keep your BS up in a normal level. To me fighting lows while my kid is barfing is a fearful thing.

I worried a lot and was fearful a lot soon after my son's dx in May 09. I finally got a reality check when there was a thread on here about disaster planning and how long could you survive without insulin, like if roads, etc. were out in your area. When I told my husband that I was worried about how long John could survive, and I said - what if the plants where they make insulin are destroyed? And he looked at  me  and said "Are you seriously worried about that? Do you KNOW how ridiculous that sounds?" And I finally got it. It was ridiculous. So I did what I can do to make sure that we can survive a few days without our house, etc. (Have a ziploc bag with a bunch of everything and would just have to get insulin out of the fridge if our house was burning or something).

So when fear and worry strike, I take the action I can and then just don't let myself think about the 'what ifs' - and here's why: I can't do one bit of good or one bit of anything by worrying about them. If there is an action I can take to improve or change the situation, I will take it. If not, worrying only makes me feel bad, and keeps me from doing other things. For me, praying helps in those situations where I am stuggling to stop worrying and God doesn't care how many times you keep handing the same worry over to Him. He'll always take it. :)  

It sucks to live in a place of fear, and you don't have to let yourself live there. It isn't always easy, and there are parts of the future that are scary, but spending time worrying won't make them any less so.

I was diagnosed with T1 when I was eleven years old. I am 28 now,married with my own business, getting ready to try and have a baby. The best thing my parents did for me was to allow me to play an active role in my control by giving my independence. By independence I mean they sent me to sleep away camp for 8 weeks at a time, allowed me to go travel Europe, attend college across the country, attend grad school in Europe. Their motto was that I was a person living with diabetes NOT a diabetic because I couldn't be defined as a disease. I know you're scared and it's normal. Trust me, I've had my complications. Just don't let your fear parent because that will only hold her back from living the fullest life she can. She is not going to be living under your roof forever and the best thing you can do is let her play an active role, make sure she has the best medical care and  a true understanding of the disease, and do not let it rule her life. Don't go to the complications group because all it will do is freak you out and that' not going to help. Go to your MD or NP and address your fears with them. There are complications with ANY disease and as long as you know them then you know how to prevent them. So in short, don't fear just respect. Respect that this is a disease, it's not going to be a walk in the park, but it is manageable. I use to equate it to college. As long as you go to your classes your going to do well. Well as long as she tests her blood and manages accordingly she is going to do GREAT.