Almost 1 year

My.daughter was diagnosed February 28th of 2017. She has adjusted very well to all the new and she does a very good job assisting with her care. We work as a team and between the two of us and her teenage sister we manage to keep her sugars relatively under control.
About a month ago my daughter asked how we will celebrate her anniversary. I am torn by this question. I googled diabetic anniversary and saw things suggesting a diaversary celebration. Is this really something people celebrate? That day felt like the end of the world last year. How do i help her celebrate all that she has done, and how much she has grown without it being a reminder of the awful feelings we all went through those first few days in the hospital. She strives for life to be as “normal”(as she puts it) as possible. Has anyone found a good way to acknowledge that day? Any thoughts are appreciated.

Hello @aakrzeminski,

My congratulations to you, your daughter and al those close to her for guiding her through her first year - I know it isn’t easy.

I’m aware that many people celebrate “surviving” a year with diabetes but for me, I really didn’t think I had accomplished enough until I had been able to live with diabetes and celebrate many other milestones and accomplishments. My first day of “celebrating diabetes survival” was on the first day of my 70th year of life which was also my day of retirement after productively having worked for over 50 years and was also the 53rd anniversary of being diagnosed with diabetes.

As a parent, you can pat yourself on the back and say you have survived and cared well for her, but I don’t think she should yet begin celebrating until she is managing HER diabetes to fit in with HER full, active and productive way of living.

I know I’ll be heavily criticized for writing this, but having been through many changes in life that required ME to alter MY diabetes management for more than 60 years what I wrote is my sincere belief.
Compare living one year living with diabetes to learning basic multiplication tables with becoming a doctor of higher mathematics.

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I was diagnosed in first grade and my family always celebrated my diaversary–we still do, actually. Typically we would have a fun day as a family; my parents would let me pick what I wanted to do–go to the zoo, go shopping, something like that. Once or twice I even missed a day of school for it when I was younger (I’m not suggesting that, obviously :wink:). I think it’s really great to celebrate that kind of milestone because living with T1 can sometimes feel like an endless journey with no real reward, and it feels awesome–especially for a kid–to know that all of that work is recognized and means something.

Dennis, thank you for your thoughts. My daughter is only 8, so yes there are several people who contribute to her care. I do believe though that ultimately she is the one who has survived even if we have done it together. I read the stories of others on here and we have met many people who either have t1d or have a child with it and i know that if she were not actively trying to learn to care for herself I would have a lot more sleepless nights. As a single mom she knows i get tired and somedays i can be forgetful but it seems the days i need her to step up her game, she does. Thats the type of thing i want to recognize. She is fighting hard and she.fights even harder to be an involved and active little girl. She even teaches her friends how to watch for symptoms of highs and lows so they can have her back. My hope is that she continues with her can do attitude into her adult years. If celebrating her diagnosis date will help with that, then maybe that’s what i do. I do understand what you are saying and I do appreciate your comments.

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bookwormnerd13,
Thank you for your comments. Im glad that your family is creating positive memories from living with t1d. Thanks for the ideas.

@aakrzeminski,
I celebrate you, as a single mother, guiding her through a year - yes, the first year is something to celebrate. I may have been too negative in my response…
I find it most interesting that an eight year old girl is teaching her companions how to recognize symptoms and know what to do to assist her. That reminds me of the first time, after almost 50 years with diabetes, someone had to call EMS for me; pur seven year old granddaughter [daughter of a single mom]recognized I was going hypo - when the medics arrived I was improving and she told them she had given me two glasses of OJ with tons of sugar.
An idea for her diaversary could be your daughter hosting a small party thanking those people who have helped her adjust to her new way of living.

Dennis,
Thank you for the kind words, and for the great suggestion. And your granddaughter sounds like a pretty amazing girl. :slight_smile:

@aakrzeminski, you do deserve praise, and I imagine that you shielded your daughter from your anxiety and worry so as not to adversely affect her outlook on life. Thankfully when I was diagnosed in the 1950’s my family never shared with me the doctor’s prognosis - at best to live another 10 - 15 years. Just a couple of months ago two of my sisters share with my how much our mother worried about me and the things they would do to keep me going.

I shouldn’t talk here about things not TypeOne, but thank you our granddaughter is amazing. She does not have diabetes [none of our kids or grandkids have diabetes] was a 22 week premi born without an immune system and with a partial lung - our daughter had filed for divorce a month before she was born. We more or less raised our granddaughter [our daughter working 24 hour shifts as Medic] and she was checking my blood for me when she was three and by five was clicking up my dose on the pen and occasionally giving me my shots. Now at 20 she is a professional dancer - pointe ballerina. She is a fighter.

Thank you Dennis for sharing. I think it is good to remember that we all have other things in our lives besides diabetes even if there are days that it does not feel like it.
After thinking about my diaversary dilemma a lot and speaking to you and a few others. I think what we are going to do is drop off balloons or flowers or something at school that day to remind her how lucky she is to be at school with her friends and not in the hospital. Then that evening we are planning a surprise dinner out with those closest to her and those that provide her daily care. I spoke to the secretary (she provides 90% of care while at school) about the idea and asked her if she would be able to come and help us celebrate my daughters growth and reward us all for the hard work over the past year. She said she would be honored to come and later sent me an email of my daughters numbers for the day with a little note that I had made her day by wanting to include her. I can’t say that this will be something we acknowledge each year but I feel strongly that this year she has earned something.
Thank you Dennis and @bookwormnerd13 for taking the time to reply. You were both a huge help.

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Hi @aakrzeminski, that sounds as if it will be an exciting and memorable anniversary day for your daughter and for those who have struggled with her through the very difficult first year. I’ll be celebrating with her and with you.
As you may have noticed, we can always count on Abby @bookwormnerd13 for wonderful and timely thoughts - she remembers “those early days” well and is constantly educating me.

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Your daughter sounds amazing. She has a very high spirit and attitude. :slight_smile: Unfortunately, I think that other students, unlike your daughter, may let their diabetes push them into shyness about their condition.

I am a student and a type 1 diabetic of six years. Like the original poster, I am also currently conducting research regarding T1D, by mine is on the effects of type 1 diabetes on a child’s self-confidence at school. I believe that we sometimes forget that the complications of type 1 diabetes can transcend physical effects, and I think it is important to analyze how type 1 diabetes can effect a child’s mindset and behavior at school. I hope that this research can either help diabetic children better understand themselves or help parents better understand what their children may be facing.

Would you and your daughter mind taking my survey below? I am depending on your support on this project. Upon completion, there is a section to add your email if you would like to receive the results of the survey. Your security and privacy is of utmost importance to me, and no information that could reveal your identity will be revealed in my research, which may ultimately be published in a student journal.

More information and the survey can be accessed by this link: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/Z6T8MC72

I am depending on your support. Thank you.

Ask her. Does she want to “celebrate” or feel “normal”. It’s her life and her way to live it. There is nothing wrong with either way. But it should be HER decision.

We celebrated her one year with a beautiful cake,with our 10 year old granddaughter!She really enjoyed it!!

That sounds really nice.
BTW, I only found this forum last week and have been all over it because of the great information and support. I reread my post and it sounded rather abrupt and rude. I didn’t mean for it to come out that way. Sorry.

@sgwilson Steven, Since I posted that first question we have “celebrated” her diaversary. The word still sounds negative to me but it is what she wants to call it and so we do. The celebration was great and since then she has approached her doctor and told him she wanted the pump, gone through the training, and she has now been on the tslim pump for about 2 months. For the most part any decisions that have to be made regarding her diabetes are her decisions, sometimes I strongly suggest she check her sugar, or recommend she eat something specific, but I try not to overrule her, even though I could since she is only 9 years old. However, I try to help her come to the right choices for her health, which sometimes takes a bit of effort. I don’t want her to develop bad habits now because I want her to take her condition and care seriously and never do something she knows is bad for her health just because her mom said to do the opposite. Whether it is something as small as a anniversary celebration or giving herself insulin because she wants to eat a cupcake, I try to let her make the choices whenever possible.

WOW! I applaud you both!!!