My son was diagnosed with type 1 DM about a year ago. He is managing his diabetes well but is doing very poorly psychologically. He is hostile most of the time, using drugs (mainly marijuana), and flunking school (despite high intelligence). He is under the care of a good psychiatrist and we've also seen a drug counselor. They have recommended that we consider placement, at least temporarily, in a residential school for troubled teens. Since my son likes the outdoors, we were particularly inclined towards programs with a wilderness program. Unfortunately, most of the schools we've considered do not take type 1 diabetics. Does anyone know of good residential schools for troubled teens that accept teens with type 1 diabetes? Thanks in advance for your thoughts!
I'm sorry to hear he is having some issues. Were you looking for a school in NC? I did a quick search and found one called Sorenson's Ranch in Utah. I have no idea if it's a fit for what you are looking for but in looking through forms - it goes through medical history and list diabetes among many others. I didn't see that it would be a disqualification. Here is a link if you want to take a look and possibly call. http://www.sorensonsranch.com/index.html You could also do a search to see if there are any reviews on it. In the least it's a place to start - they may even have a recommendation closer to you or a someone to call. Best of luck to you.
One more for you - the NATSAP main paige - might be a good place to call for answers - http://www.natsap.org/to_parents.asp
Poor guy :( Sometimes we all need extra encouragement and a little help along the way. Have you asked him what he would prefer-- maybe giving him a sense of control about his situation would motivate him to work on helping himself.
Depending on your state's law, he may be able to "drop out" of high school and take the GED test and then go to community college or a 4-year college.
Perhaps he would prefer home-schooling, if that's possible. Home-schooling offers flexibility in material and schedule, and would give him more say in his education. He would also then have more time to explore other activities that he enjoys (instead of using marijuana, etc..).
Either way, I hope everything works out.
ALSO, home-schooling doesn't need to involve the parent/parents if that would be an issue. Again, depending on state law, you may be able to hire a tutor, which would still probably be less expensive than a residential school.
I have no idea how to answer your question. But I was wondering why they would not accept your son based on the fact that he has diabetes? What makes him not qualify, because they don't have proper training for people with diabetes or something?
wilderness programs have long gotten a lot of flack for being unsafe - because a lot of them are. But the effect is a huge focus on liability in the programs that are safe. Any medical condition is a standard disqualifier in many programs.
In addition, hypothermia and dehydration are both significantly harder to manage with diabetes, and the most common wilderness medical concerns.
I'm not saying it's right - i think equal access is more important, but i do understand in our current legal culture why it would be unpopular to allow diabetics.
Thanks, Dan. We're not limiting our search to any geographic location. Many schools don't say on their web site that they don't take diabetics but when you talk to them or look at their detailed info, it comes out. Thanks for the recommendation. We'll take a look.
Thanks, Doug. (Sorry I called you Dan last post, by mistake.)
Thanks for your thoughts, Ally. I appreciate it.
Yes, many of the programs involve significant rigorous outdoor programs and they feel that they don't have adequately trained staff to take care of someone with type 1.
[quote user="ajax"]
wilderness programs have long gotten a lot of flack for being unsafe - because a lot of them are. But the effect is a huge focus on liability in the programs that are safe. Any medical condition is a standard disqualifier in many programs.
In addition, hypothermia and dehydration are both significantly harder to manage with diabetes, and the most common wilderness medical concerns.
I'm not saying it's right - i think equal access is more important, but i do understand in our current legal culture why it would be unpopular to allow diabetics.
[/quote]
I actually know someone whose son ( not diabetic) died in one of these programs...
Sounds like your son needs something more then high school. I myself am a dropout- but I went straight to college because I was SOOO board and not very well taken care of in school.
Sending him to be around other troubled kids can have a very negative effect- getting him around successful people may be energizing. People who are doing what they love and can get him the guidance to so what he wants. actually... come to think of it i may know someone who can help you out. I'll get back to you in a few days
Makes sense then I guess. Maybe if they had trained nurses it would work.
[quote user="stilledlife"]
Sounds like your son needs something more then high school. I myself am a dropout- but I went straight to college because I was SOOO board and not very well taken care of in school.
[/quote]amen. high school doesn't sound like the issue - denial and rage sound like the issue. pls consider getting your son some kind of psycological help. HS was a real problem for me - so were drugs, alcohol, anger, and avoiding anything remotely having to do with diabetes.
Thanks, everyone. We agree that denial, anger and drugs are the primary issues. He is seeing a good adolescent psychiatrist, we have consulted with a drug counselor and he has seen a therapist. He has seen his primary care physician, his endocrinologist and the diabetes educator and there are no obvious medical issues, other than drugs. However, he is making essentially no progress and indeed things are getting worse. His behavior at home is awful and he's now essentially refusing to go to school at all. Several of these helping professionals have suggested that an alternative setting, such as a residential school, may help him. While academics is some concern (because we think things will get worse if he has to repeat this year of school), our main concern is getting him help to change this downward spiral he seems to be caught in. He is an exceptionally bright and creative kid yet he seems hell-bent on self-destruction.
Joe: How did you get turned around?
Okay. I am contributing this in light of something that I went through. I was hospitalized for a lengthy period of time...you might call it a type of residential facility. It nearly destroyed what little health I had. They took my insulin pump away. They told me that all I needed in a 24 hour period was two shots, in the morning and the evening, of Regular insulin. It took a day of starving myself by not eating anything to get my blood sugar to come down to 250.
High blood sugar always wreaks havoc with me emotionally. At least now I can connect the two together and step back from reacting...but in high school, I went inside and stayed there. I locked the door. I struggled for too many years with drugs and alcohol until enough was finally enough.
So my version was not showing anything about how I felt. I was informed that even if I did everything right, everything could still go wrong. My reactions was if nothing really matters, then why try? I was so angry for so long.
I think music and a sense of something greater than myself saved my life. I maintain my health and associated concerns with as much calmness as I can muster. I just got tired of feeling horrible all of the time. I really wanted, all along, to be accepted and loved, to make something of my life, to be healthy and able to live well and not feel awful in every sense of the word, but I felt so bad for so long in my heart that I started to have the horror of feeling like there was nothing better out there.
That's a bad place to be. I feel for your situation...I understand, I think, what he is going through. If it is, then maybe he will use that fighting instinct for good...because if he can fight against something, he can fight for it as well. I think I sort of turned the survival instinct upside down, but it was there waiting for me whenever I would imagine that I had finally had enough.
Fear didn't turn me around. Punishment didn't turn me around. (I know you asked Joe, not me). Love turned me around. And when the love of my life relapsed and became an active user of serious drugs, and I couldn't just move out, I had a period where I couldn't function without knowing where he was...if he was okay...who he was with...when he would get home...how I could get him to stop...and nothing worked.
It never worked for me to have someone try to force me to do what I knew darn good and well I needed to do. I just pushed back. In my case, I went inside. In his case, if it is the same, he lashes out...
but I started taking care of myself, and I told my love, every day, that I loved him and I believed in him. Every day, at the end of it. I was so angry with him. I worried constantly. All that did was make me less strong, less able to respond appropriately to situations. So I stopped. I sought support for myself. When he was ready and had finally had enough, I hospitalized him. It was the hardest thing I think...one of the hardest things I have ever had to do.
Today we are both different, healthier people. We have rough spots. But it isn't the same. Sorry for the long post. I hope you aren't annoyed by what I said. I meant it in the light that there is always hope. I hope that you and your son...your family...support network...have a better time soon, however that is defined for each of you.
I'm curious why drugs are a primary issue? Marijuana if used properly is beneficial in the treatment of diabetes. Meaning you can get a legal prescription for marijuana, in states that allow it.
(My personal experience is being sent away to a rehab or residential school does not help. It just puts you in the company of other troubled youths who teach you worse habits.)
(From my experience with a highly intelligent teen child...allowing the child to fail and be held back is a POWERFUL motivator to make sure they never fail again. Something about how much more important peer pressure is than parental pressure during the teen years.)
I am really sorry to ear that your son is having challenges. I would not understand why, if you were sending him to a program that was offering psychological assistance that they would not assist with diabetes. He should have all the tools he needs to monitor himself. But if they won't do it .. who needs another fight.
I know it must be difficult for you too. I seem to remember that about the time I got diabetes was when my father started traveling for work. It was no easy task dealing with me before, and certainly not after diabetes.
It may be best for the FAMILY to go on a support retreat group - I am sure everyone could use support and guidance in this difficult time. It sounds like it is more than diabetes.
Good Luck,
Scott
[quote user="concerned"]
Joe: How did you get turned around?
[/quote](not in this exact order) my anger eventually hardeded me and although I quit the drugs (all except cigaretts) in 1986 I only did the minimum to stay alive (injecting insulin) while ignoring everything having to do with self care. I met a girl who was substantially crazier than me, who was incedentially an addict, and I married her. Then lost my job and went broke. I spent 4 hours in jail following a "domestic violence" complaint, which was about when I decided to divorced her. Then I sold my house and gave her enough money to be okay for a year or so. I got involved with a self-help group (Al-anon) and discovered that I was the real source of my pain - but I liked to blame it on other things and other people. It kinda got better from that point on... not perfect, but better. I guess looking back you could say I became too exhausted to continue being angry, which is a good thing because I would have killed myself if it went much further.
ps - that was 12 years ago. Today I am pretty good at taking care of myself, I'm re-married, working, a homeowner, and I'll be a Dad in about a week. oh yeah, I also quit smoking in 1998. cheers!